Disclaimer: There is no way to put the experience of giving birth into words. It's indescribable. However, I think it is very important to try to put the memory into words to preserve it. Every detail sticks out to me- that's why this is so long. :)
Lovely. If there was one word to describe Maggie’s birth
experience, that’s the word I would choose. Granted, there were moments of
great intensity (more on that later), but now, nearly 2 weeks later, when I
reflect on the experience, the overwhelming feeling is just how lovely and
enjoyable the whole thing was!
Wednesday, January 9, 2013 I went to bed pretty early and
slept well for hours. At 2:30am I woke up to go to the bathroom and was too
uncomfortable to go back to sleep. Afraid this was just another in a long
series of false alarms, I decided not to wake my husband, Jonny, but tried to
rest on the couch, distracting myself by watching a show. At 4:30am, the
contractions started to get more intense than they had in the days before. Instead of just pressure and tightening, they
actually felt like they were creating change in my body. I was thrilled, but
tried not to get myself over-excited in case they stopped again. I woke Jonny
and he helped me work through contractions as I swayed on the birth ball while
he reviewed laboring position videos from ibirth. We lit candles and went back to relaxing
on the couch. At that point, the
contractions seemed to slow a bit, and I was so scared they would stop. At ten
days past my due date, I was ready for real labor! The contractions didn’t
stop, and I tried to embrace each one, welcome the intensity and ask for more.
As I had been with my first labor, I was in complete awe of what my body was
doing on its own.
At 6:30am, our two year old little girl, Molly, woke up,
hours before she would usually wake up! She wanted “milk-side” (morning
nursing), which turned out to be very effective in increasing the consistency
and intensity of my contractions. We then stayed in bed with her for almost an
hour, cuddling and enjoying what we realized might be our last time with her as
our only little girl. Finally, I decided I needed to get out of bed to cope
with the contractions and we got up to make breakfast.
Around 7:30am we sent Molly across the street to our
wonderful neighbors’ house to play with her friends. She was so excited to get
to go play with them that she wasn’t sad to leave us at all, but I remember
giving her a big hug and thinking about how grown-up she was getting.
Molly stayed at their house for about two hours until we
decided that these contractions were probably turning into real labor. The
pattern wasn’t always consistent, but they weren’t stopping. In between, I
would doubt that it was actual labor, but then a contraction would knock my
socks off! We called Molly’s grandparents to come pick her up for the rest
of the day (or however long labor took). They brought us food and took Molly
home with them.
We continued to enjoy laboring together, using the birth
ball, the bed, the bathroom, the kitchen counters (loved the height and
stability of the kitchen counter- it was ideal!), etc. Around noon we let the
midwife know that we thought we’d need her to come, but not for a little while
still. We ended up having her come around 2:45pm, which was when the snowstorm
really started. It was so nice not to have to worry about driving anywhere as
the snow came down harder and harder.
When Rebecca, our midwife, arrived, she set up her supplies,
took my vitals, listened to the baby, and helped fill our birth pool. The
contractions were still manageable, but felt very productive. In between
contractions I was able to enjoy chatting with Jonny and Rebecca. I was still
excited to be in labor, but had to work a bit more to relax through
contractions. At some point, Rebecca
offered to give me an herbal mixture (cohosh)or break my water to encourage
things along faster, but I felt like everything was happening at just the right
speed and I wanted to let my body do what it was going to do as long as things
were going well. In the end, I was able to birth my baby with no interventions-
I didn’t even have vaginal exams because everything was going well and I didn’t
feel like it would be helpful/necessary. I felt so fortunate to be supported by
Jonny and Rebecca, who both trusted my body, the birth process, and kept a
watchful eye on us for safety. I knew in their hands I didn’t have to worry but
could totally give in to what my body was doing.
I was so overwhelmed as I went to pick her up I didn’t
realize I was kneeling on her cord, so I had to reposition myself and I sat
back as I lifted her out of the water to my chest. Her cord was pretty short,
so she just barely reached my chest. I held her in the water with a warm towel
and her daddy and I just admired her and told her how happy we were to meet
her. It was just such a lovely, perfect moment. Her eyes were closed, so we turned
off the lights and she opened them to look up at us. She snuggled right into my
chest and immediately attempted to latch on.
